It is a basic truth that when you begin a relationship, it all seems promising. You feel all the butterflies in your tummy, and you are so certain that your partner is “The One.” Because you are in love, you think that nothing could ever come in between you and your loved one. Unfortunately, this is not always the case. Some relationships do not last, and if that is not bad enough, some relationships even fall apart without the other person knowing.
If you are in a relationship, and you feel that something might be wrong, do not be the last to take action! If your relationship is regrettably bound to fail, you should start watching out for signs. But then you might ask, “How can you say when a relationship is over?” Truth be told, there are so many ways to know, but these three common situations can help you determine the real status between you and your partner:
1. You no longer communicate as much as you used to.
When you were starting out, you would constantly text or call each other. Less than five minutes after he drives off from your house, you would be flooding his phone’s inbox with your “I miss you” messages. Before, phone calls would last until 2 or 3 in the morning while you talk about anything under the sun. And of course, when the other is mad or upset, you would not let the day pass without resolving your issues.
These are the normal scenarios in a fun, healthy relationship. They are commonly experienced in the beginning, but some people are able to sustain this kind of communication. If you are not among those people, then the relationship might be over.
So how can you say when a relationship is over? If you and your partner both no longer exert any effort to communicate, it is. Awkward silences and stares would never sustain your relationship so if you want to work things out, better strive to keep those communication lines open!
2. You fight all the time.
If you find yourself fighting about the smallest things all the time, you might be in a relationship rut that could lead to a breakup. While it is true that a conflict here and there makes a relationship healthy, too much of it is never good.
So if the fights keep on coming, or even resurfacing after having resolved them previously, you might want to consider separating.
3. There is someone else in the picture.
How can you say when a relationship is over? Well, it is definitely over if there is another relationship on the side. If you believe or even know that your partner is cheating on you, you should not even have doubts about breaking up with him or her. Do not even think twice — just get up and leave. If you try to fix the relationship, you might only be hurting yourself more.
Fidelity is an important factor in a lasting relationship, and if this is lacking in yours, you are better off single. Love and respect yourself enough to admit that the relationship is over and that you deserve better.
Are you interested to know how much a divorce process costs? Do you always worry that processing divorce will leave you broke? Divorce is a very emotional process, and costly at the same time. There is a lot of paperwork that you have to finish, too. Before going through the process, it’s important to know about the expenses.
The attorney’s fee may vary, but the typical hourly rate nationwide is $250. The fee covers different kinds of attorney’s services such as the following:
1. The full presentation of the case – The attorney will deal with every issue and aspect of the case.
2. Partial representation or limited scope of the case – The attorney will manage only a few aspects of the case like dealing with child custody and alimony but not with the division of property.
3. Consultation only – The attorney will provide advice and needed documents, but will not represent them.
Some people reported that they were asked to pay as low as $50 for their attorney while the others paid as much as $450 per hour.
Most attorneys will request for a down payment to make sure that his services will not go into charity. The initial payment is around $4,500 to $6,500 if the attorney charges $350 to $400 per hour. Once the deposited payment is down to $1,000, some attorneys will request for another down payment. This is how much a divorce process costs for attorneys, and then the down payment process repeats over until the case is finished.
Litigated divorce is considered as the most expensive of divorce proceedings. In some courts, a trial for two days may cost $25,000. It is costly because the process starts with adversarial tone wherein both parties have not yet come to terms and are ready to face each other in court, each party with their divorce attorney. In this type of divorce process, nobody wants to give in no matter how absurd his requests are.
In litigated divorce, each party may pay around $13,000 to $27,000 for their attorney. This is the reason a divorcing couple should work out their differences first before proceeding with the process.
Divorce mediation is becoming more popular to divorcing couples because they understand its extensive benefits. The average cost for this type of divorce is $5,000 only. Some people think it’s too high, but it’s a whole lot cheaper than litigated divorce.
Both parties benefit from this type of divorce. They can both feel that the settlement was fair and just for each of them. It also leaves them inbetter relations, which is important if children are involved.
An uncontested divorce is the simplest of all divorce processes. In this type of divorce, the person being sued does not fight the case. The spouse being sued is in the agreeable state throughout the proceedings.
So you see, not all types of divorce processes can leave you broke. How much a divorce process costs only depends on the type of process that you want to go through.
Filing a divorce can be an easy process, but has a big effect on a lot of people. And although it is an easy procedure, it is not an easy issue to decide upon. There are a lot of things to consider before deciding on this. If you want to file a divorce to dissolve your marriage, consider asking yourself the following questions first:
1. Do I still love him/her?
A lot of people claiming they want a divorce still have feelings for their partner, and these feelings usually are still strong. However, because of the continuous struggle about many things in the relationship, their intimacy and closeness are affected. If you are one of these people, you should first try to work on your relationship first before you decide on filing a divorce or else the negative feeling brought about by the divorce may devour you and you may find yourself feeling worse than before you had it filed.
2. Were we married?
Being married doesn’t mean you underwent a ceremony and had put a ring on each other’s finger. It also involves both partners creating a bond that includes a “we” or an “us”. Most people contemplating on divorce had a marriage that only consisted of two people meeting their needs. They may have formed a family together with their children but may never have participated in activities that required the unity of the entire family. They may have asked “Is this good for me?” rather than “Is this fun for us?”.
3. Am I truly decided? Or Am I just threatening?
Divorce is usually threatened by couples especially when there are heated arguments:
• That came from frustration and anger
• That come when you don’t agree with each other regarding real changes
• When one partner tries to be dominant and tries to control the other. Or tries to get the other to see things his way.
• When you feel that the marriage is breaking apart.
Before you make up your mind about divorce, you should first be 100% sure that this is what you want.
4. Am I sincere in deciding about it?
Being ready about divorce means you are emotionally prepared to make an unemotional and clear decision which can support you as time goes. Being divorced means that you are capable of letting go of all emotional attachments to your partner, his/her loved ones as well as those hostile ones.
5. Can I handle the consequences?
When you are officially divorced, it doesn’t end there. There are consequences that you should cope with. Grief is almost always present because the dream of a “happy family” has died. There are disappointments, failures, loneliness, inadequacy, rejection, and other painful feelings you have to deal with, and there are times when all of these feelings come to you at the same time. You have to be sure that you can take all of these head on.
The above questions are just a few of many things you should ask yourself before being finally decided on filing for a divorce. It is not easy to deal with, and it sure is not a good feeling. You should keep in mind that once you sign the divorce papers, there is no turning back.
Life has never been easy for couples who went through a failing relationship, which advertently lead to a divorce. Whatever the reason is for the split – and whether both parties agreed to the separation or not – going through a divorce can turn the life of the people involved upside down. It can also be emotionally and mentally infuriating for both parties to go through a divorce.
However, there are many things you can do to cope with the unfortunate events. Most people who have gone through the same phase in life learn from the experience for them to grow stronger and wiser.
Although many people find it hard to deal with the breakup, many people are still able to enjoy life after divorce. This article will discuss some of the things you can do in order to carry on enjoying life after divorce.
How to Enjoy Life After a Divorce
• Learn to accept
Divorce can be hard to accept but if going through such ordeal is inevitable, you need to face it head on. Bear in mind that your life after divorce can also have a positive impact, but you can still not rule out the fact that there will be consequences that you need to endure. Admitting the fact that your relationship with your spouse is over is one of the first steps toward your emotional stability. This is essential for you to enjoy life after divorce.
• Maintain a positive outlook
After the divorce, you need to look at the bright side as you will be able to live a new life. Although you will still have to endure the emotional and mental struggles, having a negative outlook will just worsen the situation.
• Surround yourself with the people you love
After the divorce, you might as well spend your time with people whom you love. You can enjoy spending the night with your best friends or spend a weekend vacation with your family members. This is also the best time to get to know them a lot better especially if you have spent the past years on your married life. Dwelling on the divorce while sacrificing your social life can bring no good to the table.
However, you also need to choose the right people to spend time with as many people who just gone through a divorce force themselves to start a new relationship as a form of rebound. This is actually not a good idea as you will likely find yourself stuck in an emotional roller-coaster ride in the event the relationship doesn’t work out.
• Spend some time doing the things you like
Most people who went through a divorce seclude themselves from society as a form of defensive mechanism. However, doing nothing with your life after a divorce is an unhealthy option. What you need to do is to do things that you love or wanted to do for so long. You can start doing art, read books or find a new hobby that you enjoy.
• Set goals and implement an action plan to achieve those goals
Finding a balance in your life after a divorce can be challenging. Rather than dwelling on the past, you can set some specific goals for a better future. You can choose to start a new career for better financial stability. You can also engage yourself in a new business. If you have children, you can set some goals that both you and your kids can share.
Enjoying life after a divorce is possible. The end of a relationship does not mean that your life ends as well. You will need to carry on and consider the unfortunate event as one of the hurdles that you will need to face in life. You just need to work on your life so that you will become a happier and wiser person.
There are thousands of websites that have directories filled with thousands of legal forms and documents. You can find a contract or a legal document for just about any purpose.
Although, most of these websites require you to pay a certain amount to be able to access their vast directory. If you would only want to download a single document for your business or any freelance activity then paying for access to the whole directory would seem like such a waste.
Furthermore, you might end up paying for a document that you will not be able to use or edit. Luckily for you, there are five sources of legal free forms that you can check out.
All of these websites recognize the struggle of making your legal documents without a lawyer. That’s why they have collected public documents that you can use. You just have to find the right one in each directory because their list varies from each other.
Listed below are the top 5 sources of legal free forms:
- Docracy – This website has a large array of free documents available for download. These documents come from different lawyers, non-profit organizations, and other users of their service. This website allows you to download legal forms that you can edit according to your specifications. They even have a feature that allows you to sign electronically the documents for free. You can check out their website here.
- Internet Legal Research Group (ILRG) – They boast an astounding 2,000+ free legal documents on their websites. Their forms are written to comply with state-specific laws and even challenge anyone to demonstrate that their documents are not compliant with state law. They continue to expand their directory and would be pleased to get an e-mail from you if ever you don’t find the legal form that you need. They have documents for businesses and personal use. You can visit their page and see if the document you need is there.
- LawInfo – They assure their consumers that these documents are open and are 100% free. However, they do disclaim that these legal forms should be used according to one’s discretion. Their legal forms are for business, wills, debts, intellectual property rights, family law, real estate, and other general matters. Their website can be found
- Get Free Legal Forms – This website recognizes the difficulty in finding the right legal document especially if you are not well-versed in the language of law. That is why they have provided a color-coded free legal documents directory. They believe that an on organized location would eradicate the daunting task of looking through thousands of free legal forms. You can find the directory here.
- AllLaw – This website has very specific legal documents for personal use. They have various legal documents on personal injury and disabilities. They also provide forms for real estate and business.
Using a free legal document comes with some fine print. These websites are not responsible for any damages or consequences that may arise upon using their documents. The liabilities will fall mainly on you. This is why these websites strongly advise that you should at least get a consultation with a professional to avoid any trouble in the future.
Legal cases are being filed in court every day, and people are getting sued by the minute. Legal fees for a good attorney can be very high and in most circumstances, a client’s bank account depletes, whether they win or lose the case, due to various attorney fees.
The state recognizes the right of the people to be able to defend themselves in court, despite their financial and social status. That is why pro bono programs were created by bar association upon the requirement of the state.
It roots from the phrase “pro bono publico” which translates to the phrase: “for the public good.” This means pro bono is done with the public interest in mind. Most lawyers do this partly to improve the image of their firm or to expand their experience and network.
Pro bono programs are found in most bar associations. These programs have attorneys that waive their fees and defend their clients for free or at a relatively lower rate. These lawyers under these bar associations are obliged to do a specified number of hours doing pro bono work.
Pro bono lawyers can help in cases that involve domestic violence, family law, sexual assault, neighborhood disputes, and some criminal matters. It would also depend on the case and the lawyer if they would be able to waive the fees completely or if they would only be able to cut the costs.
Do you qualify for pro bono?
Not just everyone can be allowed to enter the pro bono program. Each program has a given set of standards to determine if a certain individual deserves the free/reduced-rate legal help.
For you to be considered, you have to prove that you are in fact incapable of hiring your lawyer. You can do this by showing them the list of your assets or your income levels. There are also special cases where people living with HIV/AIDs and those who are abused are allowed to be enrolled in the pro bono program.
There are bar associates that require you to get the approval of the head of the firm, the ethical officer, and the supervisor to be allowed in the pro bono program. The complicated process of applying for a pro bono lawyers often result in a lot of people not getting the help they need.
Looking for Pro Bono Lawyers
You do not need to have an extensive network and knowledge on how to find pro bono lawyers in your community. You can find lists on the internet of lawyers who provide free legal help.
All you have to do is determine which bar associate covers your state and look for their website. Most often than not, these bar associates dedicate a section of their website to their pro bono program.
If you don’t know which bar associate handles the lawyers in your community, then there are websites that will help you find the legal help you need. These websites recognize your struggle of not knowing how to find a pro bono lawyer in your community.
You can even look through the yellow pages because some of these bar associations post the whole list of the lawyers involved in their pro bono program. To find the right pro bono lawyer you should contact some of the names listed on the pro bono program and have a consultation with them regarding your specific case. Each lawyer has their specialty and you should determine which lawyer will be able to help you most in your legal issues.
When you have found a pro bono lawyer that can help you in your case, you should be prepared to ask him or her a few questions during the consultation. These questions may include things like their experience in the industry, their knowledge about your case, and the past results of previous cases like yours.
Looking for help in the wrong places would not get you your desired results. By asking the right questions, you will be able to determine which pro bono programs will help you win.
This does not mean, however, that you have the ability to be extremely choosy. These lawyers may be obligated by the state to help you, but it does not mean you can decline every possible lawyer that comes your way just because they did not fit the description you had in mind.
Family members suffering abuse are advised to get help from the national domestic violence hotline
While official statistics of abuse and violence within families have been a cause for concern, the actual unwritten figures that should include, the many unreported incidents could be quite alarming. Not only would a clearer picture of the situation be possible, but so will a great deal of intervention, if victims of these acts would not hesitate to get help from the national domestic violence hotline as soon as such problems arise.
Domestic violence is often unreported for some reasons. In many cases, a physically abused wife may be fearful of bringing her case to the attention of the proper authorities, because she believes they would arrest and incarcerate her abusive husband, thereby depriving her family of their only means of support. Others are fearful that a violent family member who is apprehended and penalized by the law could, one day, be back with a vengeance and make things even worse for everyone.
There have, indeed, been instances of overzealous social workers who resorted to a severe intervention such as separating children from their parents rather than leaving things to sort themselves out. Such indiscretions, however, are soon rectified, resulting in a positive outcome for the members of the family. Families who endure violence and abuse inevitably realize that the worst thing they can do is allow the problem to fester, with a misguided hope that they can deal with such things by themselves. A little bit of trust and confidence in their local social workers would be beneficial.
Still other victims of abuse are reluctant to get help from the national domestic violence hotline because they dread the shame and scandal that could accompany the appropriate intervention by authorized personnel. Sadly, there are families who would prefer to endure the abuse and maltreatment by a family member than subject themselves to humiliation and “loss of face.” These families should develop some confidence in the competence and integrity of authorized service providers who have received the appropriate training and cultivated the proper outlook towards performing their work with the utmost discretion. They are, after all, tasked with protecting the victims of domestic violence, and not adding to their grief.
There are, however, some families whose cultural backgrounds cause them to attach undue value to honor and avoiding shame that they willfully shun any intervention, whether from peers, relatives, and least of all the government, just to avert any degree of scandal simply by making sure nobody knows about the situation. Personnel of agencies that address the problem of domestic violence often have to proactively investigate such cases, even if there was no call for help.
There are, of course, some victims who prefer not to get in touch with the proper authorities to deal with domestic violence problems because they have been trying to avoid dealing with authorities altogether. Having strived to remain inconspicuous or “under the radar” due to some anomaly or misdemeanor they are guilty of, whether it be tax evasion, illegal residence, vagrancy, or some other transgression, some people are reluctant to get help from the national domestic violence hotline, fearing that once they are logged into the system, all their guilty secrets may suddenly come to fore. It is advisable for such people to simply come clean and face all these issues, and allow the authorities to deal appropriately and justly with the domestic violence problem, which is often a relatively serious and even life-threatening hazard that surely outweighs any civil offense one may be hoping to conceal.
Finally, there are victims of domestic violence who fail to get help from the national domestic violence hotline or even from local law enforcers because of ignorance. Some people are not even aware that help is available. Worse yet, some people are not even aware that they are legally entitled to State protection against such acts, whether or not these acts were committed by a stranger or a member of their family.
A great deal of domestic violence can be avoided or ceased if families were more aware of and had more confidence in the system behind the Hotline. A round-the-clock national network that was established less than ten years ago, the hotline takes calls from any part of the United States, and refers the issue to the appropriate response personnel and organizations in the specific locality of the victim. The highly-trained responders are equipped and knowledgeable in dealing with any form of domestic violence, including marital rape, child abuse, elderly abuse, unwarranted incarceration, and the like; as well as the various forms of physical violence and mutilation occurring within families which may seem culturally permissible, but are, nevertheless unlawful.
This worthwhile response system would only be valuable if the people it was meant to serve are willing to avail of it, and readily get help from the national domestic violence hotline whenever warranted.
Divorce procedures can be very messy. If you do not make the right moves and decisions, you will probably lose the case. The first thing you need to do is find yourself a good lawyer that will defend your interests in court.
However, a good lawyer does not come cheap these days. Divorce attorneys want to make sure that their services will be paid off after the case. This is why the client and the attorney have a pre-agreed amount when it comes to retainers.
A retainer is an assurance that the client will still be able to pay for the services of the hired attorney. This is because they want to ensure that despite other elements that deplete their client’s bank account, there will still be enough money left for them. Retainers are collected by lawyers so they can put this money in reserve.
Each month, the legal fees and professional fees to be paid to the lawyer will be deducted from the retainer. Retainers can be used to pay the hourly fee of your attorney, the cost of photocopies and faxes, court filing fees, payment to assistants and other employees involved in the case. That is why the agreed amount of this retainer should be large enough to be able to pay for the anticipated amount of expenses.
If you are looking into hiring a divorce attorney and they asked you to provide a retainer, there are five things you should ask a divorce lawyer before paying a retainer.
- Is there a contract or written agreement?
When dealing with a large amount of money, you should always ask for the agreement to be on paper. This is to avoid any confusions and unforeseen loopholes to complicate the process. This is also to ensure that you will not be tricked into giving all that money to your lawyer for nothing.
Make sure that the agreed terms and amount is written in the contract. Read the draft and change the terms you do not feel comfortable with. Remember, you are the client and it is your money on the line here. You have to know that the contract you are getting yourself into is fail-safe.
- Will I get what is left of the retainer after the case?
Although it is a given that the money should go back to you after you’ve paid all the fees you owe, clarifying it would help, you avoid getting scammed. Ask your divorce lawyer about this and tell him to include it in the contract. By putting this agreement on paper, you will be sure that after the case, your lawyer will not take off with the rest of your money.
- Where will the retainer fee go?
You have to know where your money is being kept and make sure that it is not just lying around in your lawyer’s safe. In most cases, lawyers would offer to put it in a trust fund under your name. If your divorce lawyer did not offer this option, then you should raise the issue.
You have to know that your money is safely tucked in a bank. Your lawyer should be the only one who has access to it as well.
- Where will you use the retainer fee?
This is one of the most important questions in the five things you should ask a divorce lawyer before paying a retainer. Each lawyer has different terms when it comes to handling the retainer fee. So before you pay the agreed amount you have to know where your money will be spent on.
Do you agree that your lawyer can use it to pay the rates of his assistant? Do you want to include the filing fees under the retainer? These are only some of the questions you will have to talk about.
Determining which aspects of the case will be paid using the retainer would allow you to gage how much you will need. You will also ensure that the fee will no deplete too rapidly. This allows you to have certainty that halfway into the case, you still have enough money to pay for your attorney’s fees until the case is closed.
- How will you pay the retainer fee?
You should know what terms you divorce lawyer is asking for. There are lawyers that require their clients to pay the retainer fee as a whole while some give enough leeway to allow their clients to pay it little by little. This would allow you to determine if you have the capability to keep your lawyer or if you should start finding a new one.